Bad Mom Days- I have them often enough to write this post

Every mom has bad days. Sometimes we have bad weeks (please tell me I'm not the only one, right?). Dealing with those times is crucial to raising our kids. Because giving up is not an option- we have little people to care for. Here are some of my strategies for when I'm overwhelmed (aka: losing it!).

1. Pray: I always turn to the Lord and ask him for patience, love, gentleness, and self-control (and while I'm at it I ask for the rest of the fruit of the Spirit to save time). Without the Lord, I cannot be a good mother. It is not possible. So I go to him first!
2. Remove Myself From the Situation: There are really bad moments when my kids push me over the edge. At those times I know the best thing for me to do is walk away. If I'm in danger of reacting (instead of rationally and lovingly handling the situation) then I go to the bathroom, shut the door (the kids are going to follow me anyway, right- so I know they are safe) and calm down. As long as my children are not in immediate danger this is what I do. Even if there is a puddle of water, or sugar, or all the contents of a drawer on the floor- it will keep for ten minutes- while I regain some sanity and control.
3. Major on the Majors, Minor on the Minors: On those really frustrating days where it seems like it's one thing right after another, I let go of a lot of standards- temporarily. Examples of things I might let slide for a day: the mess from the playroom spilling out into other areas of the house, giving my kids food that is less healthy but I know they will eat, not regulating petty squabbles between the kids (those that are not causing harm or endangering each other), using the TV or bathtub to get us through the really rough spots, etc. This way I am focusing on the major things like keeping everyone safe and fed, instead of having to correct every. single. behavior. I can begin afresh tomorrow training my kids in manners, kindness, sharing, and so on.
4. Take a Drive: My kids do great in the car, so if I'm really desperate during the winter months, I'll pack them up and go somewhere- anywhere. Sometimes I end up at the mall- they have a free play area. Other times we surprise Daddy at the office. Just this week, my amazing Hubby took us out to lunch. We all got out of the house, and I got some adult talking time that refreshed me after my horrible morning.
5. Use Baby Gates: I realize there are varying opinions about this one, but I know that this works for me, in my house set up, with my kids at age 2 1/2 years and 14 months. I gate my kids in the playroom, and then I can read down the hall (where I can see and hear into the play room) or do my workout, or do some chores without them under foot. And can I just say, that most times my kids play better when they are gated in there! Weird, but cool.
6. Call a Friend: I always feel refreshed after talking to another adult. I'm able to talk about myself, and converse with a girl friend, and that often changes my attitude and helps me "take a break". One key thing that I have found is not turning our conversation into a gripe session. If I spend the time complaining about my kids and the stress and the messes, then I often increase my bad mood and that does not glorify God or bring either of us joy. (That said, there are appropriate moments to call a very close mentor or friend and seek their wisdom and encouragement during frustrating times; which of course means talking about the stressful things going on. In general, though, complaining leads to discontentment. Balance is key.)
7. Play With Them: I'm almost ashamed to admit that our biggest issue is when my kids have not gotten enough of my attention. Usually I am trying to work on something and the kids keep distracting me. They feel neglected and I keep losing my train of thought, which leads to terse replies and tears! Really the best fix to frustration is dropping everything (dinner can wait, chores are less important than my kids, even canceling any outings with friends, etc) and getting on the floor and playing with my kids. Nearly all behavior issues cease after I have spent quality time with my children- after all, they usually act out or melt down because they need attention from me. I don't know why it still surprises me (I guess because I am human, selfish, and flawed. Can I get an amen?).
8. I don't take it personally: Lastly, I don't take my kids' bad behavior personally. Of course it is my responsibility to teach and train them. But, they must make their own decisions to obey. We live in a sinful, fallen world, and my kids are sinful beings (as am I). I actually expect my children to embarrass me- especially in public or when we're with people. This way I am not surprised by their bad behavior and I can focus on the appropriate response/discipline. 

I hope there was an idea or two that you can use for your own life? And I always welcome suggestions! I have neither arrived at Perfect Parenting, nor expect to in my lifetime. There are days when none of the above work for me and I fail until bedtime, when I eagerly put my kids down and wearily fall into bed myself. I think we have all been there, and all do this. So let us feel encouraged that we are not alone, and rally because we do not have to be defeated!

I'd love to hear your tricks for bad days! If you have solutions for older kids, I'd especially like to hear (because someday too soon my kids will be "older kids")?